The movie in my mind... :(
Mood miserable.
Wearing 'No maintenance' vest top, Nike sports bottoms, grey socks, a red woolly scarf and my light blue pilot jacket.
Eating/Drinking Nope. Nothing
Hearing MuteMath - Chaos
Dreamt about James related. Nothing dirty, but it was quite a nice dream. I only get a feeling from it now, cos I can't remember it now. :(
Present MSN name Like I always say, there's no 'I' in team. There's a 'me,' though, if you jumble it up... (King Baby - Wrong on so many levels!)
Talking to No one. (Still can't be bothered with MSN.)
Last text from Rachel
Word of the Day loser (cos I so am :(. )
Okay, so I've just been fencing. Mick reckons I'm coming along in leaps and bounds, literally. (And he did get me the cool socks!)
And yes, James was there, so I had a fight with him - and I only jus realised it today; but he never goes up to anyone. He doesn't speak unless spoken to, and he's bloody awkward to get a conversation out of. This proves just difficult for me, cos I have no idea what to talk to him about or at least try to keep it going.
Anyway, Jamie (Sabre Guy) was dead sweet today. I have never spoken to him once in all the time I've been fencing, so it was cool to have a chat. And he was totally looking out for me today too, which was adorable. :) Oh, I wish that James would do the same. Is James emotionally unavailable? (Is this the Grissom/Sara situation? Omg. )
Btw, I held James' hand today. It was all warm and lovely. Admitedly though, it was only because of a fencing activity and he was my partner.
And about him being my partner. I chose him, and I guess he only said yes cos I was the nearest to him, and I was the only one who offered.
*sigh* It isn't going to happen for me. He's too busy actually fencing to socialise. I wonder if he's shy. But either way: I ought to get over him like I did Sam. Why do I pick people out of my league all the time?
Laura wasn't there today, wich I guess was okay (but a little lonely for me) seeing that I was throwing myself at James, practically.
And so, I was the only girl there: didn't bother me too much though. I was too busy being bubblish. 'Twas a bit of a bubble fencing session for me. They are certainly annoying.
More fencing news: I hate Bruce. Foiled Again got a £5000 grant from the lottery. I think we're going to be buying kit. Yay.
So; why do I hate Bruce more than usual? Well, he's a Scottish twat with an ego the size of his belly (I reckon he's nearly obese. Figure that for yourself...) and everytime I did a good move, he just sniggers in his crappy little way. And when I was talking to Alan near the end, before I went; Alan told me that we hadn't fought today. So I told him I'd fight him next time with epee and foil, and win. Bruce was behind me and told me that I didn't think before I spoke. Bastard. I was this close to punching his arrogant little face> . <
I have possibly decided on my fencing mask also (for future reference: either the F100 or the 280. Dunno which yet. One's double the prive of the other, which basically sucks.
Nothing really happened today at school though. It snowed all through the day (but didn't stick around long), so it has been snowing about 30 times now over the past 4 days. I hate snow also.
Y'know, anyone who was reading this would thing that I have a lot of pent up anger inside of me. Well, they'd be right.
Oh yeah, about the Oxford trip: there are apparently 25 who got letters. Only 15 can go. This is crap. I need my letter for tomorrow or I'm not going - and I can't risk that.
Also, talking of trips; the Loughborough one was today also. Of course though, I'm not a leader for the Sports Leadership thingy cos I didn't turn up for the first meeting cos I figured I needed to be there for Becky in her time of need. Still though; I do resent not being able to go, or be given the chance to go. But friends are more important. I ought to stop being so selfish.
Anyway... I'll go away and reconfigure my memories of James tonight and try to sort out a situation that 'happened' to make myself feel better. The movie in my mind should redeem some of my hope. Hmph.
Wearing 'No maintenance' vest top, Nike sports bottoms, grey socks, a red woolly scarf and my light blue pilot jacket.
Eating/Drinking Nope. Nothing
Hearing MuteMath - Chaos
Dreamt about James related. Nothing dirty, but it was quite a nice dream. I only get a feeling from it now, cos I can't remember it now. :(
Present MSN name Like I always say, there's no 'I' in team. There's a 'me,' though, if you jumble it up... (King Baby - Wrong on so many levels!)
Talking to No one. (Still can't be bothered with MSN.)
Last text from Rachel
Word of the Day loser (cos I so am :(. )
Okay, so I've just been fencing. Mick reckons I'm coming along in leaps and bounds, literally. (And he did get me the cool socks!)
And yes, James was there, so I had a fight with him - and I only jus realised it today; but he never goes up to anyone. He doesn't speak unless spoken to, and he's bloody awkward to get a conversation out of. This proves just difficult for me, cos I have no idea what to talk to him about or at least try to keep it going.
Anyway, Jamie (Sabre Guy) was dead sweet today. I have never spoken to him once in all the time I've been fencing, so it was cool to have a chat. And he was totally looking out for me today too, which was adorable. :) Oh, I wish that James would do the same. Is James emotionally unavailable? (Is this the Grissom/Sara situation? Omg. )
Btw, I held James' hand today. It was all warm and lovely. Admitedly though, it was only because of a fencing activity and he was my partner.
And about him being my partner. I chose him, and I guess he only said yes cos I was the nearest to him, and I was the only one who offered.
*sigh* It isn't going to happen for me. He's too busy actually fencing to socialise. I wonder if he's shy. But either way: I ought to get over him like I did Sam. Why do I pick people out of my league all the time?
Laura wasn't there today, wich I guess was okay (but a little lonely for me) seeing that I was throwing myself at James, practically.
And so, I was the only girl there: didn't bother me too much though. I was too busy being bubblish. 'Twas a bit of a bubble fencing session for me. They are certainly annoying.
More fencing news: I hate Bruce. Foiled Again got a £5000 grant from the lottery. I think we're going to be buying kit. Yay.
So; why do I hate Bruce more than usual? Well, he's a Scottish twat with an ego the size of his belly (I reckon he's nearly obese. Figure that for yourself...) and everytime I did a good move, he just sniggers in his crappy little way. And when I was talking to Alan near the end, before I went; Alan told me that we hadn't fought today. So I told him I'd fight him next time with epee and foil, and win. Bruce was behind me and told me that I didn't think before I spoke. Bastard. I was this close to punching his arrogant little face> . <
I have possibly decided on my fencing mask also (for future reference: either the F100 or the 280. Dunno which yet. One's double the prive of the other, which basically sucks.
Nothing really happened today at school though. It snowed all through the day (but didn't stick around long), so it has been snowing about 30 times now over the past 4 days. I hate snow also.
Y'know, anyone who was reading this would thing that I have a lot of pent up anger inside of me. Well, they'd be right.
Oh yeah, about the Oxford trip: there are apparently 25 who got letters. Only 15 can go. This is crap. I need my letter for tomorrow or I'm not going - and I can't risk that.
Also, talking of trips; the Loughborough one was today also. Of course though, I'm not a leader for the Sports Leadership thingy cos I didn't turn up for the first meeting cos I figured I needed to be there for Becky in her time of need. Still though; I do resent not being able to go, or be given the chance to go. But friends are more important. I ought to stop being so selfish.
Anyway... I'll go away and reconfigure my memories of James tonight and try to sort out a situation that 'happened' to make myself feel better. The movie in my mind should redeem some of my hope. Hmph.
posted by ReddPhoenix at 10:31 PM
0 comments
